Hot Flashes, Cool Wisdom

Happy and satisfied woman smiling and looking in the air with green nature ivy on both side. Portrait of joyful female people standing agains an outdoor grey wall. Concept of happiness. One person

Ah, peri-menopause. If it had a tagline, it might read: “Your body’s ultimate plot twist.” It’s a stage of life that often sneaks up on you and brings with it a bag of surprises—some delightful, some challenging, and all uniquely yours.

What Is Peri-menopause?

Let’s start with the basics. Peri-menopause, often referred to as the “menopausal transition,” is the phase leading up to menopause when your hormones start to fluctuate more than a teenager with a crush. It usually begins in your 40s (though it can start earlier) and lasts an average of 4 to 8 years.

During this time, your ovaries gradually produce less estrogen, and ovulation becomes erratic, leading to changes in your menstrual cycle. Menopause officially begins when you’ve gone an entire year without a period. Think of perimenopause as your body’s way of preparing you for a new chapter—one that’s complex, powerful, and profoundly transformative.

The Physical and Emotional Ride

Peri-menopause is a full-body experience, a kaleidoscope of sensations and emotions. Hot flashes, night sweats, mood swings, and disrupted sleep can make you feel like you’re living in a weather app stuck on random.

But then there’s the lesser-talked-about, equally important stuff:

  • Vaginal dryness that might catch you off guard.
  • Decreased libido that feels confusing.
  • Shifts in arousal patterns that challenge your sense of self.
  • Dry eyes
  • Frozen shoulder
  • Itchiness

However, it’s not all storm clouds. Many women report a newfound sense of self-awareness and authenticity during this time. While whispering (or shouting) for attention, your body is also inviting you to reassess what feels good and true. It’s like an internal “spring cleaning” for your mind, body, and soul.

Impacts on Sexual Wellness

Let’s address the bedroom elephant in the room. Hormonal shifts during perimenopause can affect your sexual wellness in myriad ways:

  • Desire (Libido): You might notice your libido feels like a rollercoaster. And that’s okay. Desire isn’t just hormonal—it’s emotional, relational, and contextual.
  • Arousal and Lubrication: Lower estrogen levels can lead to vaginal dryness, making intimacy uncomfortable. But fear not—there are lubricants, moisturizers, and therapies that can help.
  • Orgasm: It might take longer to reach climax, or orgasms might feel different. Treat this as an invitation to explore your body anew.
  • Emotional Intimacy: Mood swings and hormonal fluctuations can affect how connected you feel to your partner. Communication becomes more vital than ever.

The Relational and Intimate Dynamics

Peri-menopause doesn’t just affect you—it can ripple through your relationships. Some common themes include:

  • Communication: If you’re experiencing changes, your partner might notice—but not understand—what’s happening. This is a great time to practice vulnerability and share your journey. A little humor can go a long way: “Honey, it’s not you; it’s my hormones staging a Broadway drama.”
  • Intimacy Redefined: Intimacy isn’t just about sex; it’s about connection. Use this time to explore new ways to be close, whether through touch, shared activities, or simply spending quality time together.
  • Support and Understanding: Partners often want to help but may not know how. Educate them about what you’re experiencing and invite them to be part of the solution—whether it’s holding space during emotional moments or keeping a fan handy for those inevitable hot flashes.

The Spiritual Impact of Peri-menopause

Peri-menopause is not just a physical or emotional journey—it’s deeply spiritual. It’s a time when the veil between your past and future feels thinner, inviting you to reflect on who you’ve been and who you’re becoming. For many women, this stage marks a shift from the “doing” energy of earlier life to a “being” energy, offering the chance to reconnect with your inner wisdom.

This transition can feel like a spiritual awakening, urging you to let go of roles, beliefs, or expectations that no longer serve you. It’s an opportunity to embrace your authentic self—flaws, strengths, and all.

You might find yourself drawn to practices that deepen your connection to yourself and the universe, such as meditation, journaling, or spending time in nature. Rituals, whether personal or shared, can provide a sense of grounding as you navigate the uncertainty of this phase.

Here’s how the spiritual impact of peri-menopause can manifest:

  • Reflection and Release: You may feel called to reflect on past choices and experiences, letting go of what no longer aligns with your values or purpose.
  • Inner Wisdom Awakens: This phase often heightens intuition and self-awareness, helping you tune into your inner voice and authentic desires.
  • Connection to Nature: Many women report feeling more in sync with natural cycles, finding solace in the changing seasons or the elements.
  • Embrace of Rituals: Rituals, such as lighting candles, journaling, or meditating, can offer grounding and meaning during this transformative time.
  • Rediscovery of Purpose: With children grown, careers shifting, or life priorities changing, perimenopause invites a reassessment of what brings joy and fulfillment.
  • Stepping into Your Power: Peri-menopause is often seen as a rite of passage into the role of wise woman, guide, or mentor, both for yourself and your community.
  • A Spiritual Awakening: This phase may deepen your connection to something greater than yourself, whether through spirituality, religion, or mindfulness practices.

Spiritually, peri-menopause can also be a rite of passage—a call to honor your experiences, wisdom, and resilience. It’s a reminder that your power doesn’t fade with age; it transforms. You are stepping into a new role as a guide, teacher, or wise woman, both for yourself and those around you.

When approached with curiosity and compassion, peri-menopause can become more than just a stage of life—it can be a profound journey of self-discovery, empowerment, and spiritual growth.-

Embracing the Journey

One of my clients, Maria, came to me overwhelmed and isolated. Hot flashes disrupted her sleep, and she felt disconnected from her partner. “I don’t even recognize myself,” she said.

Through education, support groups, and somatic practices, Maria learned to see peri-menopause not as an end but as an opportunity. She introduced weekly “connection nights” with her partner, explored new forms of intimacy, and prioritized self-care. Maria not only reclaimed her confidence but also discovered a deeper connection to her body and relationships.

Tips for Navigating Peri-menopause

Here are some actionable steps to embrace this transformative time:

  • Get Curious: Explore what feels good now—physically, emotionally, and sexually.
  • Seek Support: Don’t hesitate to reach out to professionals like sex therapists, pelvic floor specialists, or medical experts.
  • Prioritize Self-Care: Sleep, nutrition, movement, and mindfulness can do wonders for hormonal balance.
  • Communicate: Open up to your partner, friends, or support groups about your journey.
  • Embrace Change: View this as a time of transformation and growth.

Final Thoughts

Peri-menopause is not the end of your story—it’s a powerful new chapter. While it may feel messy, unpredictable, or overwhelming at times, it’s also an extraordinary opportunity to rediscover yourself on every level: physical, emotional, relational, and spiritual. This journey invites you to honor your body, nurture your soul, and redefine what pleasure, connection, and joy mean to you.  

If you’re ready to embrace this transformative phase with support and intention, we invite you to join Embracing Your Sacred Transition—a journey designed to guide you through peri-menopause with wisdom, connection, and empowerment. Together, we’ll explore tools, rituals, and insights to help you navigate this sacred transition with grace and confidence.  

You don’t have to walk this path alone. Let’s move forward with curiosity, self-compassion, and the belief that your best self is waiting to emerge. 💫

Facebook
Twitter
LinkedIn
Pinterest